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I’ve an uneasy feeling that the balloon is about to go up. - Wemyss's Appalling Hobby:
From the Party Guilty of Committing 'Gate of Ivory, Gate of Horn'
I’ve an uneasy feeling that the balloon is about to go up.

Oh, nothing so minor as something involving the nekulturniy Chekhist running Russia, or the pot-bellied Elvis imitator in the boiler suit, or the gibbering, sunken-eyed, ponging Persian bloke in the ’80s windcheater. 


Naked warfare, war to the knife – and the fork.  Filming, you see, has begun at Lacock in the next HP thingy.  And the shrewd provender-merchants of Chippenham, all avid for publicity and endorsement, have, it is reported, begun supplementing the catering from whatever London firm does that sort of thing, with temptingly-priced patisserie for the stars and crew.  The Baker’s Daughter, intent upon empire-building, is not likely to wear that, and is sure to rise to the challenge; a mere thirty miles of journeying will be as nothing to one of her demonic energy.


I don’t imagine it will register with young Mr Grint, mind.  I will wager guineas to pence that his spare moments will be spent getting in as many rounds as possible at Bowood.


Ad interim, however, I would suggest that the area as a whole is to be avoided, and that, if you wish to track down some sound Wiltshire cure gammon in, say, Calne, you ring up the butcher and have it sent ’round.  And should you see a cackling, energy-crackling twenty-stone-scone Baker’s Daughter going furiously by on her wild career, stand aside, and if necessary hide in a hedge or a ditch.



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clanwilliam From: clanwilliam Date: October 27th, 2007 01:16 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, if you want some sound gammon, head over to Bromham and hit Sandridge Farm. They *never* run out of bacon and gammon. If in doubt, go past Lacock to Whitehall Garden Centre or, at a severe pinch, hit the posh delis in Bath...
wemyss From: wemyss Date: October 27th, 2007 06:08 pm (UTC) (Link)

My dear.

Bless your little cotton socks, between neighbours who oblige, home cure, and Baxters, Linham, Robbins, and the farm shops, one can toss a pebble and find a good bit of gammon and a Worthy Butcher without undertaking the dangers of a trek into Darkest Kennet. Well, save for the famous Bromham Carrots.

And let us not forget the RBST Approved Rare Breeds Meats Butchers in Marlborough, Sumbler Bros, for whom Sandridge Farm are a supplier.

I was merely warning the curious and gawking away from Lacock, or attempting to do, during Potter Season (some hope!).
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