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‘Truly, Madley, Deeply’ - part 3 - Wemyss's Appalling Hobby:
From the Party Guilty of Committing 'Gate of Ivory, Gate of Horn'
wemyss
wemyss
‘Truly, Madley, Deeply’ - part 3

Estate (Diagon Gazette)

ESTATE OF THE LATE BATHILDA BAGSHOT

We are trying to trace the executors of the estate of the above-named. The executors were Franz Josef Bagshot-Bathory and Livia Sempronia McCabe. Professor Bagshot, of Godric’s Hollow, died as a result of enemy action on or about 3 December 1997. Anyone with any information about the above-named should contact Clearwater Tonks, 9 Temple Garth, London Diagon, under reference BB/MSP/6/12A.

 

Deceased Estate (Diagon Gazette)

SALT-SELLARS, Sir Willoughby Ould KCB / Reef House, Chichester. Captain RN (Retired).  12 May. / Clearwater Tonks, 9 Temple Garth, London Diagon. (George Wyvern-Salt.) / 23 July.

 

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I am an OH.  I am Hufflepuff to the core of my being.  And I have learnt that Slytherin ambition is pointless (and dangerous, withal) without its having an object.  I have learnt that Ravenclaw’s dispassionate intellectualism is arid (and dangerous, withal) without its having an end.  I have learnt that Gryffindor courage is a grave threat to all our freedoms unless it has a direction and some control.

 

And I have learnt that Hufflepuff loyalty is too important, and too dangerous, withal, to be given to any man or Ministry or to anything less than a principle.

 

I’ve a job to do, and it’s all very well being nice and scrupulous about the means, and yet: using every tool I have to hand, I have been – I think I can say this without giving myself more than my due – I have been instrumental, using every tool I had to hand, in creating a world in which elderly Squib officers of the Royal Navy may die peaceably in their beds, and probate be exhibited in the normal course.  Three decades ago, elderly female dons could be murdered in their beds and no one the wiser.  I suppose a certain rapidly aging female don today would consider that an acceptable price to pay for conducting prosecutions on the strictest academic principles without any appeal to emotion.

 

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Corn Returns (Diagon Gazette)

Home-Grown Cereals Authority

STATEMENT ISSUED PURSUANT TO THE CORN RETURNS ACT 1672, AS AMENDED, AND THE CORN RETURNS (DELEGATION OF FUNCTIONS) ORDER 2004 (NO 214)

The following are the quantities sold and weighted average prices of British corn per imperial ton of 20 cwt computed from returns received by the Home-Grown Cereals Authority in the week ended 30 July. They are based on purchases from growers during the week ended 30 July by merchants carrying on business in prescribed areas of England and Wales….

 

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There are whispers, once in a way, in the Ministry canteen, as they gorge their silly faces, that Dean Thomas once, with Finn the Cool, spotted trouble brewing, and headed it off, from reading the notices of insolvency that were gazetted that week.

 

It’s perfectly true, which, for a canteen whisper, is unexampled.

 

I’ve forgone a good deal I should have liked to have had in my life.  I’ve borne up under a good deal that was distasteful (and taken out the change in whacking the presumptuous pigs of men in court, I may add).  And when I see the Gazette reporting peaceful deaths and peaceful harvests, applications under law and property restored under law, marriage provisions and orderly probate, I’ll do it all again, as long as there’s breath in me.

 

If you seek my monument, do not listen to the scandal; simply look about you, and be damned to you if you don’t like what you see and how it was won.

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END

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Notes:

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Willie Wagstaff: a Knockturn lag.  His Auntie Annis kept a brothel and thieves’ kitchen in Knockturn.

Carrow, Amycus and Alecto: adherents (called ‘Death Eaters’) of the traitor and insurrectionist Tom Marvolo Riddle, q.v., who were briefly installed at Hogwarts School.

‘(the) Dark Lord’: Thos Marvolo Riddle, who called himself ‘Lord Voldemort’, a rebel and traitor who was defeated at the head of an insurrection. 

Cedric (Diggory): a Tri-Wizard Tournament contender and early casualty of Riddle’s Rebellion.

Minerva (McGonagall): Professor Minerva McGonagall, MMA (Domd), OM (2d), Fellow of Paracelsus, governor of Hogwarts School, late Headmistress of Hogwarts School.

(Hermione Weasley, née) Granger: The right Hon. Hermione, Lady Weasley, OM (1st), PC, MW, DMag (Domd), Mistress of Paracelsus, Rector of Merlin College in the University of Domdaniel, governor of Hogwarts School, late Headmistress of Hogwarts School; sometime Chief Witch, Leader of the Moot, and Lady President of the Council.

Malfoy (Draco): The right Hon. Mr Draco Malfoy Queen’s Serjeant (Wizarding), PC, MW, governor of Hogwarts School, at various times QS, a Ministry employee in the Department of Public Denunciations, a banker (as a second career after the death of his wife), and a landowner with Harry Potter, q.v.

Harry (Potter): Field-Auror Marshal the right Hon. the Marquess of Evelake, BC and bar, GCB, OM (1st), KCVO, DSSO, PC, &c; commonly known simply as Harry Potter.  In full, Field-Auror Marshal the Right Honourable HJ Potter, Marquess of Evelake, Earl Avelyn, Viscount Aveline, Baron Potter of Godric’s Hollow, Baron Peverell, Boudicca Cross and bar, Knight Grand Cross of the Most Honourable Order of the Bath, Knight Commander of the Royal Victorian Order, Order of Merlin (1st Class), KCVO, Distinguished Sorcerous Service Order, Mentioned in Despatches, Privy Councillor, Grand Sorcerer, late Chief of the Magical General Staff, Chancellor of the University of Domdaniel, Governor of Azkaban and Constable of the Black Tower, Ranger of Savernake Forest, Warden of the Sept Ports, Lord Warden of the Alchemical Stannaries, Magical Lord Lieutenant of Devon (and Muggle Deputy Lieutenant thereof). 

Ginny (Potter, née Weasley): Ginevra, Lady Potter (who died before her husband’s advancement to the peerage), Quidditch international and journalist.

Smith (Zacharias): a Hogwarts School contemporary of Harry Potter, q.v., who acted discreditably at the Battle of Hogwarts.

Neville (Longbottom): Professor the right Hon. Neville Longbottom, BC, GGC, late Captain, the Royal Corps of Aurors, OM (1st), PC, MW, DMag (Domd), DPhil (Oxon), Fellow of Paracelsus, President of Albertus Magnus College in the University of Domdaniel, governor of Hogwarts School, late Headmaster of Hogwarts School.

Nott (Sir Theo): At various points a High Court judge, Lord Chief Justice, and Lord Enchantellor.

Harriet Harman: a Muggle politician of the late 20th and early 21st CC.

Ronald Bilius Weasley: Brigadier-Legate the right Hon. Sir Ronald Weasley, Royal Corps of Aurors, GGC and bar, KB, OM (1st), PC, MW.

Viktor Krum: the Bulgarian Quidditch international.

Arthur (Weasley): The right Hon. Arthur Valerian Garret Mornington Weasley, the Lord Weasley of Ottery, OM (1st), KCVO, Lord Privy Spell, Enchantellor of the Duchy of Normandy and Leader of the Hereditaries.

Finnigan: Sir Seamus Finnigan, OM (3d), KP, KCMG, PC, MW, Chief Unspeakable, several times Chief Secretary for Ireland.

Dean (Thomas): The right Hon. the Lord Thomas of Pluckley Chart, KCMG, OM (2d), PC, MW, Senior Advisor to the Tally, Deputy Governor of Gringotts, and Chief Unspeakable in succession to Sir Seamus Finnigan.

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8 comments or Leave a comment
Comments
From: seneska Date: May 23rd, 2010 06:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
Damn, commented on the wrong chapter. Shows me that I should learn to keep track of all the pages that are open.

xx
wemyss From: wemyss Date: May 23rd, 2010 07:22 pm (UTC) (Link)

Oh, good, I'm not the only one who gets lost.

Ta, love.
femmequixotic From: femmequixotic Date: May 23rd, 2010 06:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
Dearest, I'm quite enjoying your fleshing out of Laura. I love her defensiveness, her touch of bitterness, her chin-up, fuck-the-lot-of-them attitude. I love that she does what she needs to do to gain what she thinks is right.

And with all of her obvious teeth-bared badgerism, the snake in me feels her to be, while not a sister, a definite cousin beneath the skin. (Not to mention I've always held firm that Hufflepuffs and Slytherins are--in certain ways--far more alike than people seem to realize.) I'm growing really very, very fond of Our Laura with each piece you post on her. I'd quite like to call her friend, I think. If she'd have me. :)

P.S. I thought of you today in church--the music brought you to mind.
wemyss From: wemyss Date: May 23rd, 2010 07:23 pm (UTC) (Link)

You're too kind.

And of course she'd own you as friend. You're by way of being her godmother, after all.
femmequixotic From: femmequixotic Date: May 23rd, 2010 07:41 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: You're too kind.

Oh, you're such a dear. I'd be thrilled to have a goddaughter like Laura. :D
noeon From: noeon Date: May 27th, 2010 11:42 pm (UTC) (Link)
Okay. Okay. But wait! Explain the corn returns! I've been fascinated since Seamus's bit. What is it? How?

Dear Laura. She and Harry together would have been absolutely terri(er)fying.

It's a lonely business and being truly clever and truly principled? Cold bed to sleep in, but brave.

PS That bit about Seamus and Dean and witches in the middle? NAUGHTY. (now with "H")

Edited at 2010-05-27 11:43 pm (UTC)
wemyss From: wemyss Date: June 5th, 2010 06:58 pm (UTC) (Link)

The Gazette, by law, publishes the corn returns regularly.

noeon From: noeon Date: June 6th, 2010 09:56 pm (UTC) (Link)

*grins*

Thought so. (wink wink, nudge nudge)

Makes for v good reading and is fun to speculate *cough* about. Also remembering Augustus and his personal control of grain supply.
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