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A few brief notes. - Wemyss's Appalling Hobby:
From the Party Guilty of Committing 'Gate of Ivory, Gate of Horn'
wemyss
wemyss
A few brief notes.
I shall soon have a good deal to say upon an unpleasant subject, but not just now. Ad interim, I don't know if you have seen the obituaries in the Telegraph, which include those for Gp Capt Bill Farquharson and for George Chesterton (cricketer, schoolmaster, and GK's great-nephew); I pause specially to note that Robin Ferrers died yesterday: a lovely man.

What I wish to direct your attention to in the Torygraph today however is what may be the best-written review of a Twilight film yet. By way of taster,

Within five minutes of the opening credits, the newlywed Bella, whom you may recall converted to vampirism at the end of Breaking Dawn Part 1, is hunting a puma in a figure-hugging blue cocktail dress. (Bella wears the dress, not the puma, although in the world of Twilight, the alternative is not unimaginable.)

and,

Soon afterwards, the shapeshifting Jacob Black (Taylor Lautner) decides to reveal his true nature to Bella’s father, the local policeman – by luring him into the forest and peeling off his clothes, while growling lustily about the world being a wilder place than he could ever imagine.

Slashfen, unite.

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eglantine_br From: eglantine_br Date: November 14th, 2012 05:24 pm (UTC) (Link)
I want to see a puma in a cocktail dress!
wemyss From: wemyss Date: November 14th, 2012 05:44 pm (UTC) (Link)

I'm sure it's on the 'Net.

Everything is.
pathology_doc From: pathology_doc Date: November 14th, 2012 07:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
The first part of the review is somewhat unclear. When the reviewer says "Bella wears the dress, not the puma, although..." etc., are they disclaiming any possibility of the puma wearing the dress, or Bella wearing the puma? One belongs in the world of furs, the other in the world of furries; and while my attitude to both is one of living and letting live, I suspect that where the twain meet, confusion (and quite possibly hilarity) must surely reign.

by luring [Bella's father] into the forest and peeling off his clothes, while growling lustily about the world being a wilder place than he could ever imagine

Yes, because such a scene contains absolutely no homoerotic subtext; no, none whatsoever. *whistles airily*

However, if one did take this scene down the well-trodden roads of slashfic, one must bear in mind that the one is canonically the future husband of the other's (vampiric) granddaughter, which might lead to all sorts of embarrassing complications if the "Imp of the Perverse" (beloved of the late Mr E.A. Poe) saw fit to have that fact revealed. One must hope and trust that gentlemen (and gentlewolves) of the modern era still do not kiss and tell, at least with regard to specific names, and that ladies (even vampiric ones) still do not ask.

Fortunately, both vampires and lycanthropes in this world still seem to affect something of a traditional, Old-Worldly attitude - it is only the humans Bella has left behind who are of the Facebook Generation, and she is well rid of them. "LOL I shagged your granddad" is something nobody needs to hear, even when the one doing the speaking is one's grandmother (regarding whom the fact is obvious and needs no mention).
wemyss From: wemyss Date: November 14th, 2012 09:32 pm (UTC) (Link)

Smart-arse.

And, quite.
tazlet From: tazlet Date: November 14th, 2012 10:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
Point of interest - who's playing the cop?
germankitty From: germankitty Date: November 15th, 2012 12:46 am (UTC) (Link)

To sum up my thoughts on Twilight

... see icon!
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